23 November, 2011

Mr. Beiber takes a Paternity Test

Justin Beiber has finally submitted to a paternity test.  This is occurring after Mariah Yeater dropped her paternity suit against the singer in the wake of rabid fans threatening her.  She didn't drop her allegations.  Why take a paternity test after the suit is dropped?  All I'm saying is, where there's smoke, there's fire and the smoke is burning my eyes right now.  

This is reminiscent of the Kobe Bryant rape case.  Fans were threatening the victim after her identity was found out by the press.  The criminal case was dropped after the victim went into hiding and refused to testify.  The civil case settled out of court, I guess money can buy everything.

I have the feeling that Justin Beiber may be settling this one out of court.  We shall see.

This file is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported license. Author: Pascal Parvex

Demi and Ashton Kaput

Goodbye creepy old lady, hot younger man couple.  You were destined to crash and burn and you did.  The only thing that surprises me is that 49-year-old Demi Moore is the one filing for divorce.  Maybe she outgrew her misbehaving boytoy.  Mr. Kutcher, 33, clearly got bored of her, judging by his alleged behavior as of late with Sara Leal.  By the way, dear Ashton, Miss Leal says that you used no protection, not smart.

The soon to be three time divorcee released this quote to the associated press, "As a woman, a mother and a wife, there are certain values and vows that I hold sacred, and it is in this spirit that I have chosen to move forward with my life."    Here's a pic of the hot one for your viewing pleasure.  

This file is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic license. Author: David Shankbone.

05 November, 2011

Lilo Headed back to Jail, Kinda.

Miss Lindsay Lohan has officially violated her probation by doing nearly nothing the judge ordered her to do under the terms of her probation.  That means she has to spend 30 days in jail, starting November 9th.  The bad news is that California jails are so crowded that she'll probably be booked and released.  No punishment for little Lilo, again.  Well, on the positive side she has to take a new mug shot that we can make fun of.  Here's an old one for now.

Ashton and Demi, Why is Everyone Acting Surprised?

Ashton Kutcher, a young hottie who had starred in movies, had a hit tv show and produced and starred in his own MTV show, Punked.  This was a somewhat immature show where celebrities were tricked into thinking something terrible was happening and then Ashton ran out from somewhere and laughed at them.  It was funny, kinda.

So, in 2005, at the age of 27, Ashton decided to marry Demi Moore, who was a movie star.  She was 42, she looked good for her age.  This is Ashton's first and Demi's third marriage.  Demi's eldest daughter, Rumer, is 10 years younger than Kutcher.  Now Demi is 48 and probably peri-menopausal to Ashton's 33, his prime.  He's the star of Two and a Half Men which films in Los Angeles. 

Kutcher recently reportedly had a hot tub romp with two women, followed by sex with one of them on his sixth anniversary with Demi.  Oops.  Today, reports popped up that Demi is allegedly having an affair with Ashton's friend with Ben Hollingsworth, he's 27.  The reportedly had sex in the back of a car.  Lovely.  

The age gap is huge.  They looked creepy together, like an incestuous mother and son.  The reported marriage strain should not come as a surprise.  They are in different stages in life.  

This file is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic license. Author: TechCrunch50-2008.

Does Justin Bieber have a Baby, Baby, Baby, and Will Selena Gomez Stick Around Long Enough to Find Out?

A tale as old as time....statutory rape and sex in a bathroom.  Okay, so it's no fairytale.  A twenty year old woman has claimed that Justin is her infant son's baby daddy.  She has filed for child support in a San Diego court. The sex with the famous little singer was described as 30 seconds long and on a shelf in a restroom.  How magical.  The baby-faced Justin Bieber was 16 at the time and the claimant, Mariah Yeater, was 19.  If convicted this would be a misdemeanor statutory rape charge due to their three year age difference. 

Mariah could face up to a year in jail.  Judging by all the celebrities that check in and out of California jails, I'm guessing three weeks max.   According to several reports Bieber is the second person to be singled out as being the baby's daddy.  Mariah claims that she was picked out of her front row seats during an October 2010 concert, by security, and brought back to meet Justin. On July 6th of this year little Tristyn Anthony Markhouse Yeater was born.

Okay, just a little analysis here.  To take or not to take the DNA test (assuming he is not court ordered to do so).  It's more complicated than it sounds.  If he's sure, it will solve it once and for all, but will he be taking DNA tests far too often for other women claiming that he fathered their child, even if they can't prove that they ever met him?  If he is the father it will quickly turn into a settlement/custody game, hopefully outside the public eye.

Mariah is poor, really poor.  She gets a meager amount of public assistance.  She does have a money motive for her claims for child support.  Her life would change dramatically for the better.  The catch, he doesn't pay anything unless the child is proven to be his.  If she knows it's not, never slept with him, like he claims, then why go through all of this?  Maybe Star Magazine pays big?  I honestly do not know.  It's a weird thing to pluck out of thin air.  I think there must be some fire under all this smoke.  Even lies usually have elements of truth to them.  She says that she tried to get a hot of Bieber through his reps for quite some time before she filed the paternity suit.  Rumors are flying that Selena Gomez, Justin's latest girl, broken it off with him.  She denies the rumors, for now.  Bieber fans are literally threatening to murder Mariah, in writing, on Facebook.  Stay tuned.

Just for fun, here's Mariah Yeater's mug shot from last year when she slapped her ex-boyfriend repeatedly and broke out a car window:

The above file featuring Justin Bieber is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.0 Generic license. Author: Adam Sundana.

27 October, 2011

Amy Winehouse's Official Cause of Death Announced

When Amy Winehouse died most people, including me, suspected a drug overdose.  Amy has had a very public addiction to drugs and alcohol including multiple stints in rehab.  The last one was about a month before her July 23rd death, she only stayed a week.  Videos from her most recent concerts in Dubai and Belgrade showed an incoherent Amy being booed by her own fans.  

Shortly after Amy's death her family announced that the autopsy showed no illegal drugs in Amy's system.  The family hypothesized that a seizure killed Amy, it didn't.  The Coroner has announced that 27 year old Amy died from alcohol poisoning, her blood alcohol level was .416.  She drank herself to death with vodka, several empty bottles were found at the scene.  The coroner has cutely categorized the Amy's passing as "death by misadventure."  

RIP, Amy.

This file is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.0 Generic license. Author: Daniel Arnold.

23 October, 2011

John Mayer Annouces Throat Surgery, Travel

John Mayer took to his blog to announce to the world that he has undergone throat surgery to remove a granule.  He is on complete vocal rest for at least a month.  I hope this doesn't affect his wonderful voice.
John Mayer also said that he's going to use the time to travel the country, to look and listen.  Keep your eyes open, you never know when or where you will get a muted Mayer sighting.

This file is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic license. Author: Julio Enriquez.

20 October, 2011

The Many Faces of LiLo

Lindsay Lohan was arrested again yesterday, for violating her probation.  This is her fifth arrest.  She's already bonded out, but the judge said that she has to do morgue duty for her community service now.  She will be cleaning autopsy tables after autopsy's are performed and cleaning toilets, among other duties.  It couldn't happen to a nicer girl. 

Here's a trip down memory lane, and the many faces of LiLo, through her mugshots over the years.

At least she's photogenic. 

13 September, 2011

This Chick Annoys Me

Casey Anthony's parents, George and Cindy are going on Dr. Phil today to claim that acquitted murderer Casey suffered from uncontrolled seizures.  If this is true, why did she still have a drivers license?  Why did they allow her to drive Caylee around?  Why didn't they have the contact information for the 'nanny' in case monkey-faced seizure girl ended up in the hospital mid-day or something.  Idiocy.  If they are holding this out to be true then  they should be charged with child endangerment.

Another Hot Man Dead Too Soon

Mehdi FavĂ©ris-Essadi aka DJ Mehdi has died in what is being reffered to as an undisclosed accident in France.  Rumor has it that he either fell off his roof or the roof collapsed under him.  He was 34.  He leaves behind a wife, Fafi.  Rest in Peace, beautiful one.
This file is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution 2.0 Generic license.  Attribution: Nicole Blommers.

A Truly Beautiful Man

Andy Whitfield died of cancer on Sunday, September 11, 2011.  He was such a beautiful specimen.  He, of course, played the lead in the Starz series, Spartacus: Blood and Sand.  He leaves behind a wife, Vashti, and two children.  He was only 39.

Photo credit: Gage Skidmore

19 August, 2011

Jesse James and Kat Von D playing ratings games?

Hmmm, LA Ink has been all Kat and Jesse all the time.  Then, a *shocking* split.  Now, the show is cancelled, Kat appears to be saving face by claiming she quit.  Hours after the official announcement  about the show Jesse James posts this twitpic.  They are engaged again, how magical.  How opportune.  Anyway, whether they ever actually broke up or not this mess of tattooed limbs are getting married.  I'll keep you updated on where they are registered so that we can shower them with gifts.

08 August, 2011

It's confirmed

Sadly, this season of Desperate Housewives will be the last.  I love that show and I will miss Lynette, Tom, Carlos, Gabrielle, Susan, Mike, Bree...well, really everyone except Orson and Renee.  Those two, I won't miss.  Whatever will I do with my Sunday nights?  ABC has confirmed this, so that's it. 

Now, I suppose, we will get to see the stars flop in movies and regret the fact that the show has ended while their houses are being foreclosed on and their cars are repossessed.  I hope Marc Cherry writes another gem, and fast.

23 July, 2011

A Terrible Waste

Amy Winehouse was found dead today in her London apartment, she was 27.  Police say that there is no sign of foul play.  There is no official cause of death at this time.  Ms. Winehouse has a long history of drug and alcohol abuse.  Still, it's sad.  She was an incredible talent and I feel lucky to have been able to enjoy her music, if just for a short time.  I have no idea what the cause of her torment was but it's over now.  Rest in Peace, Amy.

This file is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution ShareAlike 2.0 License. Attribution: Daniel Arnold.